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SNOWMOBILES glide across the sidewalks, sending the few hardy souls who are out on the streets DIVING FOR COVER.A couple of DERELICTS are cowering behind a fire hydrant, trying to avoid getting run over.Another is at his car, barking into a radio mike: COP WITH MIKE Yeah, you heard me. Cool as ever -- approaching the chase as a simple problem in logic -- he checks a radar display on his dashboard and sees FIVE BLIPS. The lead car LOSES CONTROL and plows headlong into a drift. He opens it to the PERSONAL ADS and finds what he's been waiting for: TALL, DARK, AND HANDSOME -- Christmas is coming. This puzzles him for a moment -- until he looks up the street. He JUMPS UP and, poking with the gun, manages to dislodge the panel slightly. PROVOST and the guard look up through the tiny crack in the ceiling and see nothing but darkness. From a vantage level with the roof of the car, we see the GUARD'S FINGERS, clinging to the lip of the trap door. O.; filter) When you're done, I want you to give two sharp yanks on the cord.The DRIVER jams the pedal, but his rear wheels end up digging a deep rut in the ice. In the distance, at the very center of Gotham Square, WORKMEN are stringing lights around an enormous CHRISTMAS TREE, almost fifty feet tall. GUARD Probably just some bird that's gotten in the shaft. Now his HEAD rises into view, pushing the panel aside as he pulls himself upward. His BROW wrinkles as he sees a bizarre sight -- PASSELS of SQUAWKING BIRDS, walking back and forth in front of him, STRUTTING and PREENING mere inches from his face... As he's knotting the cord around the handle of the box, a DINKY BIRD flutters down through the trap and sends him into a panic. Cowering in terror, PROVOST reaches for the cord and yanks it twice. Why are you Behind him, FRICK and FRACK are pulling on RED BERETS and BATMAN SWEATSHIRTS -- Order of the Bat gear.The COPS race about like headless chickens, trying to concoct a plan. Thrilled beyond words, they WHOOP WITH GLEE, slapping high-fives as the car streaks past. BRUCE stumbles out the museum feeling mildly discombobulated.A couple of them are trying to scale the stone walls of the park. His face is weirdly illuminated by the flame still spitting from the front of the car. He marches down the front steps past a NEWSSTAND -- where he stops to buy a copy of the afternoon GLOBE. The GUARD looks up at the trap door in the ceiling of the car. He uncuffs the BOX containing PROVOST'S RAVEN from his wrist -- and STANDS on it. Unholstering his gun and using it as a prod, he can almost reach the trap door. PROVOST gives him a boost and he manages to catch hold of the lip of the trap door. PROVOST wraps both arms around the GUARD's wriggling LEGS and tries to hoist him upward.The COP at the wheel goes wide-eyed and nudges his partner in disbelief. squad cars are now massed at the entrance to the park -- but there's one problem. Moments later, they spot a RED GLOW on the horizon... He's gone, but she knows she's left a dent in his armor.Before their eyes, FIVE SNOWMOBILES appear from the cross streets up ahead and CONVERGE at the entrance to Gotham Park. The city's snow plows don't operate on the park roads -- and the entrance is blocked off with SAWHORSES reading "CLOSED TO TRAFFIC." A huge steep drift prevents them from entering -- and so all they can do is stand by helplessly, WATCHING as the snowmobiles vanish into the trees. The COPS peer down the long corridor of the cross street -- and see a STRANGE BLACK VEHICLE barreling toward them at 90 MPH, with no intention of stopping... ..their JAWS DROP as the BATMOBILE roars into view, BURNING OFF THE SNOW IN ITS PATH. (snorting and weeping) Look, I'd better get some fresh air. She smiles in bemusement as HECATE jumps into her arms and PURRS.
And now, as night falls, an ILLUMINATED SIGN winks on above Broad Avenue: "JOYEUX NOEL GOTHAM -- Only 16 Shopping Days Left Till Christmas." The streets are bustling with jolly shoppers.
He takes evasive action, but the SHARK FIN always seems to follow. The ROBBER is feeling good about himself, because the Batmobile can't follow either. As he drives alongside the grove, he HITS THE ACCELERATOR, passing the snowmobile on its left. SELINA (cont.) That's one thing I can give you, Bruce -- danger -- a little something you can't get at home. He moves forward slowly; SELINA's eyes close; their lips draw slowly closer... A BAND is playing on a makeshift ORCHESTRA PLATFORM erected in front of the tree, leading the crowd in a spirited rendition of "God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen." The Square is rocking with good will toward men. Suddenly, there in the darkness, they hear a series of loud POPPING SOUNDS...which BATMAN straining to listen. The GUARD tumbles in a heap to the elevator floor, his face PECKED and CLAWED beyond recognition, his eyes gone altogether. He peers at the open trap door, sees the BIRDS staring curiously down at him, and SHRIEKS AGAIN. She rips off the lock and opens the box for a quick look at her trophy. He ducks right just as a SHARP SPIKED HEEL strikes the exposed brick a mere three inches from his throat. GLASS TUBING shatters and SPARKS FLY as she calls down from the shadows -- CATWOMAN I should tell you -- I've got nine lives to play with -- and you've only got one...
A STEEL SPIKE attached to a cable launches from the side of the Batmobile and WEDGES ITSELF into a distant TREE. When they get to the part about saving us all from Satan's power -- -- the CAMERA TILTS UPWARD to BATMAN, watching the action from his usual gargoyle's perch. The LEAD GUARD starts to press the UP button, but PROVOST pulls a key from his pocket instead: PROVOST No -- my private elevator. In BG, the helicopter on its pad, idling noisily, the rotors still spinning. We get another faint series of POPS -- barely audible over the CAROLING from below, and the loud PUTT-PUTT-PUTT of the helicopter blades. But the TWITTERING has him a bit concerned as well. It's there, all right -- another RAVEN just like the first two. The NEWS VENDOR has stepped out onto the sidewalk to watch the tree festivities. He gets a quick glimpse of a FELINE SHADOW springing past a skylight; she's jumping all around the roof, clinging to exposed pipes and fixtures. He catches her leg, upends her -- but she somersaults away and lands on her feet. He turns -- she drops DIRECTLY ONTO HIM -- and locked in a death grip, they STAGGER BACKWARDS across the roof, directly toward the HELICOPTER. BATMAN ducks instinctively and the CATWOMAN breaks free -- FALLING BACKWARD onto the roof.
Every time they poke their heads out, another SKIDOO whizzes past, missing them by inches. These guys are obviously going to get away clean -- MORE SIRENS.
A COP takes a radio call as he streaks down the long wide avenue which borders Gotham Park -- one of the few streets which is relatively clear. ...a FORTY-FOOT JET of NOVA-INTENSITY FLAME erupts from the front of the jet-black supercar -- instantaneously DISSOLVING the drift that blocks the entrance to the park -- turning the ice and snow on the paths before it into water! The COPS get to their feet; cold as it is, they're TWO BURLY TEENAGERS -- both dressed in RED BERETS and PARKAS with BLACK BATMAN SWEATSHIRTS visible underneath -- are trudging along the path when they're STARTLED by a pair of speeding SKIDOOS.